I don’t know why this story didn’t get more play in the worldwide press: Switzerland invaded Liechtenstein over the weekend!
That’s Switzerland, the world’s most neutral country.
I didn’t even know they had a military. When you think of the Swiss, you think of chocolate, cheese, and fine timepieces. Oh, sure, there’s the Swiss Army Knife, but that just conjures up pictures of guys dressed up as soldiers threatening the enemy with a corkscrew, a can opener, and a tablespoon. We’re not exactly worried they’re going nuclear on us. The biggest worldwide threat thus far from Switzerland was when “Heidi” pre-empted the end of a Jets-Raiders game in 1968.
It turns out they do have an Army, and some real weapons, too. This weekend, 170 armed Swiss soldiers mistakenly crossed the border in the rain and made it a mile into Liechtenstein before they realized their error, turned around, and went home (they’re good with watches, but not so much with the GPS!). What’s funniest about the story is that Liechtenstein didn’t even know they’d been invaded. No one noticed the Swiss troops with their assault weapons — no ammunition, by the way — and even when they heard about it, everyone in Liechtenstein forgave the Swiss and went back to their regular lives.
That’s exactly the kind of war we need, where no one gets upset at an incursion and you can make fun of the troops!